Take a step away, gather yourself, and get your shit together

Learn how to step away, gather yourself, and get your shit together.

We’ve all been in that moment of panic, despair, where we felt like everything was closing in on us. Our muscles were too sore, too weak, too fatigued to continue on. The last thing we wanted to do was run one more mile, or lift one more weight. We had convinced our mind a thousand times over that it was ok to quit and we had already pushed hard enough. There were other athletes and people that were standing around, yelling at us to go faster or lift more but we had already decided we were done.

I’ve learned one very important thing in these moments of panic and despair. It’s ok to step away from the bar, breathe deep, count to ten, and tell yourself to get your shit together.

I was on a run two weeks ago, my legs weren’t feeling it and I had told myself it hurt too much and I was going to only run four miles instead of the planned seven. At mile four when I had originally told myself I was going to quit, I stopped. However, instead of quitting, I took a deep breath, counted to ten, told myself to stop being a pansy and to get my shit back together. I don’t know why, but it worked. It slowed the pain and the panic down that I had originally been feeling and I finished the seven miles.

It’s ok to take a step away and gather yourself. Occasionally we need that moment to ourselves saying it will be ok. The next time you feel overwhelmed no matter what exercise in sports or life you are doing, slow your body down, take a deep breath, count to ten, and get your shit back together. Then get back to it and hit it harder than you ever thought was possible.

A Hero Amongst Us

This past weekend one of my very best friends was involved in a life altering accident. Coming home from a fun night out, the car they were driving careened off the freeway flipping three times. Through the midst of this tragedy, my friend’s life partner, threw his body over hers to protect her from any harm coming her way. The car finally skid to a terrifying stop. Silence filled the air. My friend threw herself out of the car to run to the other side to see if the love of her life was indeed ok. As she approached the other side of the vehicle, she knew at that exact moment that things would be different. The paramedics took him out of the car and rushed him into surgery to begin the repair of facial fractures and many other serious injuries he sustained. He currently sits in critical condition with brain swelling amidst a hundred other things. 

When my friend shared this horrific story, it reminded me of something that is so simple but seems to be incredibly difficult. It’s a small tragedy that each of us will go through at some point in our lives.  In a blink of an eye, everything we have ever come to know – love or  hate – can change. That’s it. In one split fucking second a moment can alter life as we have come to know it. People we love can be gone before we can say a word. Goals and dreams can be dashed without warning. 

A story like this puts everything into crystal clear perspective. And all of us need to cut it out. Stop taking loved ones for granted.  Stop being mean or short. No more holding grudges.  No judging.  No criticizing. Just cut it out. All of it.

Yet it seems so difficult to look at all we have, and realize in the blink of an eye, it could vanish.  I believe, and will always believe, that we see what we want to see. The faults we once found attractive become something we despise in those we love. The jokes we used to laugh at come at annoyance. The once awesomeness and dedication becomes an old memory.

Look, trust me when I say I understand how terrible people can be. I’ve been both the asshole and the person that was put down as many of us in life have been. Be grateful for everyone that has at some point been put in your life. Too often we take those closest to us for granted. Too often we focus on the flaws that other people have and not the strengths they’ve blessed our lives with. 

I did something I’ve never done before. I wrote down the names of ten people that I felt had wronged me, or I didn’t like very much. I thought about each individual I had jotted down and wrote three things about them I liked. Each person, whether they ever know it or not, taught me some kind of lesson I will be eternally grateful for.

Tell those that mean the world to you how much they mean to you. Tell them you love them. Hug them, do stupid things with them. Live your life as if today is the last day you’ll spend with them.  I know that I’m going to give my two little babies the biggest hug and kiss whether they want it or not the next time I see them.

To my dear friend Amber, thank you for showing me we all make mistakes but we love anyways. We know the mistakes of those closest to us because we know more about them then anyone else. Love them for their flaws, love them for everything special they do in our lives, and love them for the many blessing s they bring to your life.

To Chris, you have a support system way beyond anything you could ever imagined. Be the fighter you are and give it everything you got. For someone that throws his or her body over another’s is nothing short of a real life hero. Thank you for showing us that heroes still exist.

6 Things I'd Do If They Weren't Illegal

1. Rob a bank-You heard me right; this actually may be my career if getting caught didn’t entail spending life in prison. It seems like the ultimate game. You try to protect your money as best you can, and I’ll try to take it from you.

2. Swim in the fountains that have the no swimming signs up-First of all if there’s a sign that says, “don’t, no touching, no crossing, ect” It seems more like a challenge to me. When at no point had I ever thought about doing what it told me to not do, it now had become one of the only things I know for sure I want to do.  I’d love to be backstroking through the Bellagio fountains as they are going off.

3. I’d eat a pot brownie for certain-Look I’m a runner and would never put any kind of smoke down my lungs ever. However, those individuals that smoke pot just look like they are having the time of their lives. So why I’d never smoke it, I may eat a pot brownie.

4. Light fireworks, wherever and whenever the hell I wanted to-Yeah, I’d basically walk around with a bag full of fireworks and light them off each time I entered a room or just when I felt like it.  Reminds me of being in Europe on New Year’s as I was walking down the street and people were shooting bottle rockets out their apartment windows. So scary but so badass.

5. Trespass-See the thing is I’d like to find a way to get into a house (without breaking anything) so I’d just be entering. Instead of stealing things, I’d like to rearrange things. When the individual got home, they’d find their bed in the kitchen, dinner table in the bathroom, ect. You know that type of stuff.
6. Swim naked in public-I don’t know why, I just would. I’ve enjoyed my speedo swimming, so I suppose this is the next step.

To Dock or Not: Utah Crazy

Utah has some absolutely crazy things. Some of the crazy is because of lack of cultural awareness and other things are a little strange even to the most liberal Utahn. 

But for me, I love everything about Utah. Cray cray or not. It’s my refuge. My place of escape, and my home.  Living here I’ve heard some unbelievable things, however what I heard yesterday takes the cake.  Let me preface by saying this may be a little graphic, so stop reading if you’re a little soft. 

Docking or soaking, those two words really didn’t mean much to me until recently. Those from Utah, or more explicitly, those from Utah County, may already know what I’m talking about. For those that don’t, let me explain.

Most of us understand what sex is? If you don’t… Not much I can do to help you, besides tell you to google it. Docking refers to the term where the male inserts his penis into the vagina and just sits there.  He doesn’t move, she doesn’t move, he is just docked there. 

A couple I talked to recently isn’t allowed to have sex before marriage. However they stated, “docking isn’t sex.” You could imagine the wheels in my brain spinning as I tried to process this concept. I could only process these three thoughts as they began telling me about it:

1. Yes, it is sex. You’re insane. Case.closed. 

2. Why? Just why?! Docking? Even the name is bizarre. Is it a boat? What size boat? Where ya docking it? Do you dock often? Ok, enough.

3. The dude obviously has way more self control than I ever will. This is similar to taking me to a bike store where everything is free but telling me I’m the only one that won’t be allowed to take anything home with me. You just sit there. You literally don’t move. How in the hell is this fun? Why? Just why?!

Utah is crazy but this was something that I couldn’t believe. It makes zero sense to me. However, it made my day and so of course, I wanted to share. You’re welcome.

100 Days of Crushing Rejection

Rejection. It hurts. Or at least we have convinced ourselves of that. As rejection sets in, we believe it has something to do with us. Rejection can be debilitating. It may stop us from chasing our dreams. From getting what we want.

Think about it. Have you decided against asking someone out because you were afraid they’d say no? What about trying to get that new job? Tell someone how you felt about them?

Rejection. It stops us in our tracks. Even just the perception of it, never knowing whether or not it would actually come true.

Well for me, rejection is a fear. And it’s real. I’ve convinced myself it’s not ok. So, over the last couple of months I’ve tried to change that; tried to work hard to get past this mental roadblock I’ve created over rejection. I’ve taken this time to do things I never thought I could. I haven’t succeeded at all, but I’ve learned a lot.

Recently I decided to take it up a notch. With the help of my cousin Nate Bagley, we created a group that has committed to doing one thing a week that scares the shit out of you.  Well then that didn’t see like enough. So Nate sent me this video where a gentleman decided to do something once a day for 100 days where you go out and look for rejection. At the time, this seemed like such a crazy concept. However, I decided that I was in. I would face my fear. We formed a group of 4 to hold each other accountable. It was also decided we would come up with challenges for one another to do.  It was important to me that the three other would follow through and were as crazy as I was.

This concept and idea got me excited but something happened as I received my first challenge today. I thought I couldn’t do it. Day one challenge one and I already said to myself, ‘I can’t do it.  That’s crazy!’ However, I committed and I’m all in. I’m ready to fail and fail big.

I’m certain I will post pictures and video as we all encounter different obstacles. This is something that absolutely scares the shit out of me. However, I understand chasing your dreams requires putting everything out there and being able to deal with the consequences.

As we go through this process hopefully we’ll realize that it’s the smallest things we are the most afraid of. And throughout the next 100 days I hope we learn to crush rejection.

If this scares you, join our 100 days of rejection. Getting more people to the party is always fun. If you choose to do it, have fun, good luck, and let us know how your journey is going!

As for me, I’m off to face my first rejection challenge. Take it easy.

32 Life Lessons For My Littles

My children have always been the center of my universe.  Here are 32 pieces of advice they will be learning from their dad!

1. You always choose tails in a coin flip.
2. Always stick up for your family and friends.
3. ALWAYS believe in yourself, no matter what.
4. If someone gets hurt, it’s only ok to laugh if they don’t look hurt.
5. If you’re rude to someone, I will have no tolerance.  Mean people suck. But remember to always be kind.
6. Fountain drinks at the gas station always taste better than 2-liter bottles at the store.
7. In my house, Santa Claus will always exist.  It’s better to believe that a ghost may walk down the stairs and scare the shit out of you. Makes life much more interesting.
8. Stand up for what you believe in. Being quiet to avoid confrontation is not ok. It doesn’t make you kind. It makes you passive.
9. You’ll make mistakes. Suck it up, learn from it and move on.
10. We do not cheer for BYU. Ever.
11. If the computer is broken, just turn it off and then back on. I don’t know why this works but it does.
12. Dress with class.
13. If you hear some funny/loud noises coming from my shut bedroom door, don’t open the DAMN DOOR.
14. Most of the things you worry about will never happen.
15. If you end up in jail, you probably better call me and not your mom. I’ll be mad. She’ll be furious.
16. We never push or hit girls and we always open doors. Chivalry should never be dead.
17. I get to shoot a super soaker at your face for every second you waste playing Nintendo.
18. We may fail, but we never quit.
19. If a woman is upset, hold her and tell her how beautiful she is. If she starts to growl, retreat to a safe distance and throw a chocolate at her.
20. No one ejects his or her USB safely from the computer. It’s just a big waste of time. Just pull it out.
21. For the love of God, don’t stick hand soap in the dishwasher.
22. I make mistakes, get used to it.
23. Come up with a better answer than, “I didn’t answer because my phone died.”
24. I’ll push education more than sports. You won’t understand this in school, but when you get older you’ll thank me.
25. If you don’t ask, the answer will always be no.
26. When in doubt, mumble.
27. You can drink, but only in moderation.
28. If you judge someone for his or her race, sexual orientation, gender, or religion I will judge you for being stupid.
29. Winning is fun, but it teaches you nothing. Failure is the best teacher in this world. Winning is a trophy, failing is an education.
30. If I take you to a sporting event, know if you want to leave before it’s over you’re never coming again.
31. The best things in life aren’t things.
32. No matter what you do, what stupid decision you make, I will always love you.

Eric Doehrman

It’s been a little hard to believe all the support I’ve gotten from this blog. I did it just as a fun idea, thinking it would only be something my mom would read. Shocked that thousands have read it. I’ve been so blessed throughout my life to have come across some of the most incredible people. I think on Thursday’s I will do a “Thankful Thursday” blog on someone who has in someway shape or form touched my life.

Eric Doehrman

Have you ever had a dream that you could feel but that you’re not quite sure you could explain? Did your dream leave you without a road map, never knowing exactly how you were going to get there again? My dream was about triathlon. And with it, my dreams have me achieving some pretty amazing things.

 

But just like in life, we have big things we want to accomplish and often times, we don’t have a compass telling us how to get there.

 

If we’re lucky though, we may meet someone who is wise beyond their years; someone who has so much to teach that if whether we have years together, or only have a few brief moments, they can change our lives forever.

 

For those like this, they can bring out the best in us, show us how to believe in ourselves when everyone else doubts us. These are the kind of people that make you believe anything is possible. They don’t tell you it’s going to be easy but, they teach that you through hard work and dedication, anything’s possible.

 

Let me introduce you to Eric Doehrman. Eric’s who’s helping me reach my dreams. He’s the man with the compass.

 

Eric’s been my coach, my mentor, and a friend to me for years. He’s helped countless individuals realize their dreams by giving them the right map to chase them down. He’s the first one who believed in me, and I’ve seen that same great passion of his exude onto others. He’s the kind of guy who is first to pick you up and the last hanging around when you need someone. He’s many people’s biggest supporter. And when you believe you can’t, Eric’s there to help you understand and believe that yes you can.

 

Eric has a way about him. And there’s always a method to his madness. He’s the type you listen to, a coach that’ll make you faster, stronger and better. He knows the limits of his athletes and he's never satisfied with mediocrity. He does his homework and understands the sport of triathlon better than anyone I’ve ever met.

 

Eric’s smarts translate off the field as well. He’s a man that taught me that family comes first. As much fun as triathlon is, being a dad is more important. Family is scheduled first, triathlon second. He’s a humble guy, never asks for praise. He’s one who always leads by example. Not only does he talk the talk, he walks the walk. The love he has for his wife beams from his; he cares for his kids, and takes care of his athletes.

 

For all he’s taught me, to say I’m lucky to have come across this incredible man, is quite an understatement. Thanks, E. I owe you. Big.